The Bradfords

I have a lot to write, but its all so swirly in my head right now.  So stay with me here, it may be a bit of an unorganized post!

How is it going?  It is going really well.  I miss it, and I don’t.  The thing that is the most obvious is how often I just naturally try to go to it.  Like I head to the TV to turn it on or I pull out my phone to check facebook, without even thinking about it.  It’s like it’s a natural extension of who I am.  And I do not like that.  I don’t want to be addicted to or rely on media to get me through the day.  I want to rely on God to get me through.

Giving up tv has not been a challenge.  I really have broken my tv habit over the years.  I used to have lots of shows that I was following.  And then we got cable and a DVR and it made my addiction worse I think.  People say that when they get a DVR they watch less TV, BALONEY!!!  It’s true that the DVR gives you the luxury of not watching commercials (which is amazing), so that the time you spend watching one particular show is less, but the DVR gives you the option of watching whatever show you want whenever you want, which is also a cool feature but lends itself to the TV habit!!!  Anyways, two years ago we decided to give up cable and with that, out went the DVR.  Now, I just don’t even have the option to look for new shows to watch.   By the time I sit down in the evening its usually after 9pm and I try to go to bed by 10:30, so there’s no real use in trying to watch anything, and have any quality time with my hubby.  So there you go, have 4 children and your tv habit will break itself.  It’s really a simple solution .

All that being said, I do enjoy watching Good Morning America in the morning.  Yes, I know there is a lot of fluff to that show and it can barely be called a news show, but I enjoy it.  And if there is anything major happening in the world they will cover it in the 4 minutes of news they report.  I also enjoy a little PBS for my darling 2 year old.  She doesn’t really watch it, but I like to pretend that she is.  So I miss those two things. I also realize that I have the TV on often for background noise.  That is going to be stopped when this thing is over.  It catches my attention far too often and the background turns into the foreground really quickly.

As for the Internet…………we basically have cut out sports news (easy for me, it would be painful for me to look at sports news for 5 minutes!) and facebook.  So we have been using the Internet to look things up, get email, read a few blogs (only of people I know personally) and reserve library books.

I am trying to figure out what my devotion to Facebook is.  I think there are many things that contribute to it.

1) About 70ish percent of my waking day I am with people who think that bodily functions are hilarious and/or cannot wipe their own noses.  I am in desperate need of some grown-up conversation.  And its wonderful to see other Moms going through the same things.

2) I am not an easy conversationalist.  Words often don’t come quick enough when I am talking to people.  But when I’m writing it I can take my time.

3) I have family who do not live in my town or state.  I want to see pictures of my nieces and nephews and be ‘in the know about their lives’.

4) I always wish I would write the things down that my kids do, but I always forget.  FB is sort of like a little journal to document the funnies and not so funnies that happen over here in this crazy house!

5) My church community it fairly active on FB and if I have a prayer request I can be sure the news will spread and people will be praying instantly.  And in turn, I can be praying for folks who need it too.

So for those reasons, I do miss my dear Facebook.  But there is a issue that arises too.  Even good things can be overdone or used in excess.  I definitely was treading that water.  It isn’t right to be looking at facebook when the four little faces that are in your care are sitting right in front of you.  I don’t even want to imagine what that does to them deep down.   Its bad enough when you are doing something important and don’t have time to be with them!

My husband always uses the term ‘a false sense community’ for what Facebook creates.  I agree, to a degree.  Those people that I haven’t seen for years and probably had forgotten even existed had it not been for FB, yes, there is a false sense of community when I am commenting on their posts.  But for those people that I have a true, real-life connection with, I think that FB can enhance that even more.  A way to be even more connected to them when you can’t physically be with them.

I look forward to getting back on FB next week.  I miss my peeps!  I will be using the grouping function so I can focus on the people who I have true community with!

Phew, this is getting long.  The whole point in this, and all, fast/s is to allow God to fill the spaces that you create by taking something away.  This first week that didn’t come too easily, I mean seriously, there are many other things that slip very easily into any free time I have.  But this next week I am trying to focus on God and listening for anything He has to tell me.  I want to hear from Him and I know He will speak if I am quiet enough.

It just doesn’t seem right that I just revived this old blog and now our family is unplugging ourselves from media for two weeks.  How about this, I plan to post next week sometime to tell you how our little experiment is going.  And maybe I could sneak in a couple of cute things the kids said since I will be going crazy that I can’t post them on facebook!

A few months ago I read this book called Seven, by Jen Hatmaker.  Jen is a friend of Marla whom I met at our new church over a year ago.  Marla connected me to Jen because she as bringing home her Ethiopian babies shortly after we brought Emelia home.  I have been so intrigued by Jen since she accepted my facebook friendship.  She is so very real, hilarious and she loves Jesus.  But more than that she is making me think (how dare her!).  Making me think about the American Dream and how I say I don’t want/need that, but when I examine my life it appears as though I am striving to go down that road.  I say that all I want/need is Jesus, but I rely on a whole lot more to get me through the day than Jesus.

So this book was an experiment that she did to help her fast from things that she loves or are a convenience, to allow God to seep into those areas.  What frustrated me about the book at first, but I love now, is she didn’t tell us what to do at the end, after the experiment is over.  But of course she didn’t.  God is going to speak to us all differently.  Not logging on to facebook is going to affect me differently than my husband, and we will have separate lessons learned when fasting from it.

So this chapter is about media.  The first three chapters were food, clothing, possessions.  (We have down an experiment with every chapter, I will have to fill you in on those another time.)  So as a family we decided that the tv was being turned off.  I really didn’t think it would be a big deal, but I as sit and type this, the girls are asleep and the tv is on. (remember it starts tomorrow).  I like the background noise, I really do.  But I wonder if that noise is so distracting that I’m not even able to hear from God when He wants to say something to me.  We are also turning off the Wii, which will be a challenge for the boys, but they are up for it!  (I’m pretty thrilled about it, sometimes I envision putting it out on the curb because it causes so much grief here).  The hardest thing for me is this whole internet thing.  I admit, I love it.  But, I want to say beyond a shadow of a doubt that I love my Lord more!

So even though this is going to be the hardest two weeks so far, I am pretty excited about it.  Please read Jen’s book and tell me what you think!  You can buy it on Amazon or Barnes and Noble!

I know, you are shocked to see another post so soon.  I’m pretty shocked as well.   I am in my house right now with two sleeping girls and no boys!  This is unprecedented!  I already did take a power nap and I should be cleaning the kitchen, but that can wait a minute (or twenty)!

I wanted to do a few updates on the kiddos and how they are doing.

Ethan, age 10, is doing great.  He is in the 4th grade and likes school.  He has an amazing teacher again this year and is excelling.  He LOVES to read and play any sport!  He is currently on a flag football team (hence the reason the house is so quiet at the moment) and a baseball team.  We are starting to experience some of the tween moments where he can’t imagine that he is not right.  I think Sean and I are looking forward to adolescence with Ethan.  Its a time that we are taught to be scared of as parents, but I don’t think that it needs to be so.  We are excited to see him grow spiritually and physically and be there for him during those tough, awkward years!  How can you pray for Ethan?  His doctor is concerned about his growth pattern and after some testing we are going to see an Endocrinologist in mid-July.  We aren’t sure what, if anything, is wrong.  We are praying that if there is something that God will heal him and no treatment will be necessary.  Will you join us in that prayer?

Eli, age 7, is our tenderhearted boy!  He absolutely idolizes his big brother and wants to please him so badly.  He is a born helper and wears his emotions on his sleeve.  A lot of things come very easy and naturally for Eli such as academics and sports.  He is in 1st grade and  loves school!  He is very well liked by all of his classmates.  He is currently on a baseball team and likes to play, but doesn’t have the competitive drive that his big brother has.  Eli is always talking about our family and loves it when we are all together.  He often counts our fish and our cat as members of our family bringing the number to 8.  We have to remind them that they aren’t people!  How can you pray for Eli?  Pray that we will continue to encourage the tender heart that he has.  I can see him doing mighty things to serve the Lord as he grows up, but I know that that quality has to be nurtured and encouraged.  Also, he happens to be our clumsy child and gets hurt often.  Pray that God will protect him from any serious injury!

Emelia turned 2 1/2 recently and we celebrated her one year anniversary of being a part of our family on March 21st!  Emelia is full of life.  She is very obsessed with me.  Always wanting me to be actively participating in whatever she is doing at the moment.  She would be happy to just sit in my lap all day long.  We cannot seem to get her to play with her toys independently.  Emelia loves to help by throwing diapers away, unloading the dishwasher, setting the table, carrying something somewhere or anything else you ask her to do.  Lately she has been experimenting with the phrase, “I don’t want to”.  Its not really going over very well and we hope that she will conclude the experiment soon.  Lately we have been talking a lot about her birth mom and her sister.  We have photos hanging on the fridge so that we can be reminded to pray for them and to think about them.  She continues to take a 2 hour nap in the afternoon and still sleep through the night.  Sometimes it takes her awhile to fall asleep at night because of her nap, but I am not willing to even talk about giving up that nap yet!  Emelia loves her baby sister and can always make Ella laugh!  I am thinking about the fall and going to try something with her, possibly preschool, but more likely a tumbling class or something!  Should be interesting!  How can you pray for Emelia?  Pray for patience for us and for wisdom to talk about her adoption with her.  We know there are/will be hurts that she will have to deal with and we are just praying for healing before the hurt even surfaces.

Ella will turn 6 months on Tuesday.  That doesn’t even seem possible!  She is such a content baby.  She’s been sleeping through the night for a good long time now!  Napping is the hardest thing.  She doesn’t transfer well when she falls asleep in her car seat.  So if we do anyting during the day she ends up taking multiple cat naps.  Lately she has been giving me a longer nap in the afternoon (like right now), so we are on the right track!  The girl is so happy.  She can roll across the room, only one direction though!    She is starting to eat rice cereal and we tried some carrots yesterday.  She doesn’t seem to love the food, but doesn’t hate it either.  Just goes with her personality!  Since 4 months we have been doing formula with her.  She prefers for me to give her the bottle, and will often get distracted and decide she doesn’t want to finish it.  Seriously she needs to get over this.  This house is FULL of distractions, she will never get a full meal in.  (Although no one is worrying about her weight at this point!).  Ella is such a wonderful gift that we didn’t even know we wanted or needed!  But now that she’s here we are all head over heels in love with her and can’t imagine our family without her!  How can you pray for Ella?  Just pray for her health and development.  Pray that her calm personality lingers and that she can adjust to be the fourth child and what comes with that!

Thank-you for praying for my kids.  Its the best gift you can give us!  Now here are some photos from the last month!

I consider myself a fairly laid back mom.  I have my moments of frustration or being overwhelmed (every day), but in general I’m relatively even keeled.  There is one thing that can really get me though, and its disrespect.

My boys are good boys.  I do get compliments all of the time about how sweet/funny/nice they are.  With that being said, when it comes to chores at home, those sweet/funny/nice qualities seem to disappear.  One of my boys just dilly dallies and takes his sweet time, the other boy gets annoyed and dare I say……….disrespectful when asked to do something (often).

They have chores they are responsible for every day, this is expected and not compensated in any way.  This past Thursday after I had given them ample time to get their homework done and have fun, I reminded them (also annoying, its April, there should be no reminding) that their chores needed done.  After their initial grunts they headed upstairs to tackle their room.

I went up to check on them after 20 minutes and its as if no one had even pretended to pick anything up.  After a few “encouraging” words, I told them I would be back up to check on them.  I gave them another 20 minutes and went back up.

I opened the door and found the dilly dallier pushing a notebook slowly from one side of the room to another and the other child READING A MAGAZINE.  I lost it folks, seriously lost it.  I lost it to the point of telling them everything I had done for them that day and this was the only thing I had asked them to do and this is what I get.  I said a few more things, I’m sure and ended it with, “I can’t even think of your punishment right now, but know its coming……..Come down to dinner”.

Sean wasn’t home when we started dinner and I couldn’t even pull it together during dinner.  I was livid.  Once Sean got home and we all got to relive the disrespect again, he was upset as well (man I’m glad our caseworker couldn’t see us this night!).

Friday we decided on their punishment.  Their Saturday (today) would be spent cleaning the house.  NO FREE TIME.  Now if there is one thing the magazine boy enjoys its his free time.  This came as a huge blow to him and he can’t quite come to terms with the fact that we are doing this.

So starting at 8am this morning they have been working.  They have done A LOT of stuff.  Including: picking up different rooms, vacuuming, cleaning sinks and toilets, laundry, sanitizing baby toys, sweeping the kitchen, cleaning the playroom and they are currently cleaning out our front closet.  They did have about an hour and a half break when my Aunt and Uncle came over for lunch.  But they will continue until about 3:30 when Ethan has a baseball scrimmage and then we are headed to friends house for dinner.

The kicker is that mister dilly dallier is loving it.  He has not complained about one thing.  He is great when he has a job to do and he has accountability to get it done.  So I’m not sure this is a proper punishment for him.  He just needs a flame under his rear sometimes.

Magazine boy is having a hard time and many tears have been shed, which just encourages us to find something else for him to do because he’s not getting it!  I do think he will think twice in the future about reading a magazine when he’s asked to work though.

Before you call child protective services on us, Sean is currently making them some cookies for a treat and they are going to have a fabulous time tonight.  Being a mom is hard!!!

Well, I took an unintential hiatus from blogging.  I really do enjoy blogging, for the main reason of having it to look back on in years from now, but life has really gotten in the way lately!  I would like to say that I am so busy that I have no time to write anything and although that is sort of true I find time to do other things like facebook, pinterest, tv watching, reading, surfing (the internet), so deep down I haven’t been blogging for some reason.

Let’s dig a little deeper, shall we?

In the past year, probably, I discovered blogs that I love.  And I love them because they are written is such a fun, witty, intellectual, meaningful way.  I return to them to see what they will say next or what are they struggling with this week?  I guess I don’t find my blog to be any of those things, I’m not sure who my audience is.

But just today, my Aunt is visiting from Virginia and she was encouraging me to continue to blog.  I also know I have other Aunts and my Mother-in-law who check it out from time to time.  So since I know there are people who are interested (besides me in 30 years), I think its time to rev up the old keyboard again.  I can’t make any promises of how often I will be on here, but I will promise to blog AT LEAST once a month, hopefully much more than that!!

If you can figure it out, leave me a comment and let me know you were here!

Holy Moly, I haven’t posted in a really long time!  I am making no excuses or apologies, the past 11 weeks have been the craziest 11 weeks of my life.  I am titling this post January, because let’s face it, it will probably be the only post in January 2012!  I will try to summarize what has happened since October 26th, but no words can do it justice!

After we brought out little (huge) bundle of joy home in October, things seemed great.   She was fairly calm, for an infant.  I remember her crying for awhile on like the second day home and I panicked, thinking, ‘oh no, she’s going to be a crier’.  But after a VERY large bowel movement her fussiness passed.  I’m not sure exactly when it began but shortly after that, our girl was upset.  She would nurse for 40-60 minutes when I would cut her off.  She would be content for 15, sometimes 20 minutes, then the crying would begin.  We would work so hard calming her down and eventually she would tire and fall asleep.  We had to hold her however when she slept, or she would wake up crying.  We repeated this cycle all day long.  At night the only way she would be content would be to lay right next to be in bed, something I have never done with my other kids.  The girl would not tolerate being put down.

My initial thoughts were that she had reflux (like her twin Ethan)!  So the doctor put her on reflux medicine that seemed to do nothing.  Thanksgiving was hard because my sisters were here and all they wanted to do was cuddle with my baby, but my baby was not cuddly.  She would cry and cry, and if I got her to sleep I wouldn’t even want to pass her off because it might wake her up!

This was exhausting enough without the fact that I have three other kiddos that were my responsibility wandering around this house.  One of which is a energetic, curious, adopted 2 year old that would demand my attention (good or bad).

On December 9th, a couple days after Ella turned 6 weeks old, I made an appointment with the doctor.  I had had it and wanted her to fix whatever was wrong!  At that appointment she changed Ella’s reflux medicine from Zantac to Prevacid and we decided we would also try supplementing her feedings with formula.  I had tried to supplement one other time and she didn’t seem interested and only took a very little bit, so I didn’t think this was the problem.

The evening of December 9th was the first evening that we didn’t have to walk with her for hours on end trying to comfort her.  I gave her the medicine and a bottle and the girl slept in her little chair for like 3 hours.  I couldn’t even believe my eyes!  We had people over that night and she was so calm and slept in my friend’s arms.  I cannot express how difficult those first 6 weeks were.  It was by the grace of God that we all came out on the other side!

We had no idea for a couple of weeks if it was the Prevacid or the supplementing that was really doing the trick.  We weren’t willing to take away either one.  But over Christmas weekend we forgot to give her the Prevacid and she was even calmer than when she was on it.  So we kept her off of it (after emailing the dr. and making sure that was recommended).

Since then we have a new baby.  She is so happy and content.  I don’t know what is wrong (if anything) with my milk supply.  I know that I wasn’t successful nursing the boys, but was so determined to make it work this time.  And it didn’t, at least not exclusively.  I am still nursing every feeding and then giving her a bottle, sometimes she doesn’t take any and sometimes she takes 4 ounces.  But I do believe it was the best decision for us to make at that point.  She is so much happier and so am I!

She currently is sleeping through the night and is very predictable throughout the day.  I am loving this stage in her development!

Emelia- she is doing great.  She has been home now for 10 months which is the same amount of time that she was in the orphanage.  I think that is quite a milestone for us!   Emelia (or Lia for short) loves her baby sister.  She is very gentle with her and wants to hold her all of the time.  Now, me on the other hand, she’s not too happy with.  The second I put Ella down Lia is right there wanting “up please”.  She is also always encouraging me to put Ella to sleep .  Right now she is sitting in my lap while I am typing this (yeah, its real easy)! She is a typical energetic, push the limits, adorable two year old.  I had forgotten how tough this stage can be.  Pray for us all!!

The boys- are doing great!  Fourth grade is proving challenging for Ethan, mainly b/c of all of the homework- but all his teacher does is rave about him!   Eli is loving first grade and doing so very well!  We couldn’t be prouder of these boys.  They are really into Ella and think she is the cutest little thing ever (they are right)!

Sean and I are just thankful for our kids and that he has a job.  We feel extremely blessed and are so very exhausted all of the time.

Now here are a bunch of pictures to catch you up on our lives:

was born on October 26th, 2011 at 8:15am.  Ella weighed 10 lbs., 10oz. and was 21 inches long.  She is doing great, and I will update more when I am better rested .

* I know there are some other things I need to report on that happened before Ethan’s birthday, but for now I wanted to get his birthday post up.  Ella will have her day, oh trust me!*

It’s hard to believe that it was 10 years ago that we brought home an 11 pound baby and had no clue what to do with him.  He was so fussy and hard to calm down.   Thank goodness those days are over (for him at least).  Ethan is such a delight.  Sure, he has days where he causes us stress and grey hair, but the way he looks at life is so very uniquely “Ethan”.

This year he could not decide what he wanted for his birthday.  He is a hard kid to shop for because he isn’t really into toys lately.  He likes sports and playing the Wii.  He loves to read, but we get most of his books from the library.  So, he has been nagging (seriously, that is the correct word) us (mainly me) to play flag football for years. I have held firm that flag football leads to tackle football and I don’t want him playing that.  It’s too hard on his body and our schedule.  Sean assures me that flag and tackle football are very seperate and one doesn’t lead to the other…….hmmmm, we’ll see.  So, we are allowing him to play in the spring, and he couldn’t be happier.  He told me this morning that he thinks he’s going to run around the house a couple times every day to get ready for the season……..I haven’t seen him running yet.

My mom bought him the chocolate whipped cream in the picture above.  You would have thought ther was a 50 dollar bill in the wrapping paper, he was so happy!

Anyways, I love my Ethan and I love the big, big brother he is turning out to be.  These girls are going to think he is so awesome (because he is).  He has taught me so much about life and about myself.  I wouldn’t trade one day I have had with him, in the past 10 years (well maybe that day in about week 3 where he cried from morning until night)!  I love you son, thanks for being such a blessing to me, Daddy and your siblings!

Yesterday was Emelia’s 2nd birthday and I had great plans to have a huge party.  I wanted to rent out the shelter where we celebrated last year (without her).  I thought it would be so cool to do it again with her there.  But as life happens and God has other plans, that just wasn’t one of them.  I am due to deliver her sister in a week and I just couldn’t get my brain wrapped around something so big!  So instead we did a small family dinner on Sunday afternoon and a small friend play-date on Monday.  I think she was celebrated well!

Emelia has been saying that she is two ever since she got home.  So now she is right .  I am really looking forward to this year with her.  Her vocabulary is so impressive, and I cannot imagine what a whole year will bring with that.  She has grown so much already in the 6+ months she has been home.  She has gained four pounds, grown at least 2 inches and went up two shoe sizes!

Emelia was very much into her birthday and got the hang of opening gifts pretty quickly.  She loved to blow the candles  out and did it twice with no problem at all!  Every girl loves to be celebrated, right?

I couldn’t help but think of her birth mother yesterday.  I am sure that she thinks of Emelia often, but I can guarantee that she was thinking of her yesterday.  I wish I could tell her that Emelia is doing so well and so full of life.  I wish I could thank her again for making the hardest decision of her life so that her daughter could have a fighting chance.  I wish I could show her a picture of the pure joy on Emelia’s face.  I wish I could tell her that Emelia is a fighter and loves to push our buttons.  But for now we just pray for her and her village.  Maybe one day we will return and share with her how amazing her little girl is.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!

Eli has been wiggling and wiggling his tooth for weeks.  He has been so anxious to get this tooth out since its his first one.  For some reason my kids loos their teeth so much later than other kids.  Ethan lost his first one a few weeks before second grade and now Eli is a few weeks into first and his first one is in the record books!

It was dangling by a string this morning and I told him to get a tissue and just pull it out.  Eli has a very low pain tolerance so he would just cry when he would try.  But he wanted to get his first tooth out on his own.  Eventually I took the tissue and gave it a light yank and it came right out.  Had I let him do it he would have been late to school!  He was so very excited that it was out.  The one right next to it is loose now!!  He’s growing up!!